Kirk Cameron wants every husband to be a heartthrob

At 41, Kirk Cameron is probably better known now for his Christian marriage ministry work than the seven years he spent as teen heartthrob Mike Seaver on the TV sitcom "Growing Pains." I suppose he gets tired of hearing about the fame he earned on that show, but it is what a certain generation remembers of him.

But I can't help connecting the dots between his role as a teenaged hottie to wanting to help couples add a little heat to their marriages. His movie "Fireproof" - the highest grossing independent film of 2008 - and related "Love Dare" book bring tools to couples to strengthen their marriages.

Kirk Cameron believes the Bible

provides great instruction for a

good life and great marriage.

Photo credit: Lynn Freeney

I interviewed Kirk on Thursday for a story that ran in the Houston Chronicle and he was sincere and down to earth. He explained his conversion from atheist to born-again Christian as happening through a couple of ways. One was that he was always curious and questionning, but simply didn't believe in God. A friend invited him to attend a church service and "found the message from the pastor (Chuck Swindoll) captivating to my intellect and my sense of morality. It caused me to ask more questions and seek more answers," he said.

He explained that neither his parents nor his siblings attended church nor believed in God. His parents had periods of difficulty that even included separation. Eventually they all became Christians and he said their deep faith has brought them peace and happiness.

The two things he said can help any marriage are finding joy and practicing forgiveness. I'd say those are two things that can make your whole life better. 

2012 will be a "happy" year

My friend Joy told me about an interesting book and web site called The Happiness Project the other day. Started by a New York lawyer, Gretchen Rubin, the web site began as a venue for her to work on being a happier person. Along the way she has inspired others to work on their own happiness.

The site is all about being happy, what it takes to be happy and how you can find happiness in things large and small.

It made me think about my own emotional state right now: happy, but with too many fluctuations. I believe that no matter what we may think other people are doing to us, our happiness is really in our own hands. Do others sometimes make me unhappy? Sure. But how I react to others can make things right -- i.e. happier -- in a hurry.

So here are Gretchen Rubin's 12 personal commandments, adapted just a bit to fit everyone.  (Personally, I plan to pay more attention to Nos. 1, 2, 3 and 9. What about you?)

1. Be yourself
2. Learn to let things go
3. Act the way you want to feel
4. Do it right now
5. Be polite and fair
6. Enjoy the process
7. Spend out
8. Identify problems
9. Lighten up
10. Do what ought to be done
11. No calculation
12. There is only love

Serita speaks out for women

Serita Jakes is the soft-spoken wife of Potter's House powerhouse Bishop T.D. Jakes, but that doesn't mean she doesn't have anything to say. Just the opposite.

Serita Jakes (Photo credit: The Potter's House)

Serita has made fighting domestic violence a priority at the Jakes' Dallas-area megachurch, with some 30,000 members. In addition to a counseling center that helps churchgoers and others copy with all kinds of problems, the Jakes work hard at promoting stronger self esteem in women  as well as strong, appropriate family roles for fathers.

The West Virginia native was on the Dr. Phil Show this week to talk to a woman coping with a violent relationship. She related a story from her own childhood: She was raised by an aunt and uncle in a coal-mining community. Often their disputes were settled with shouting, broken glass and physical abuse. So when she met Penny, a women on Dr. Phil's show who was there to talk about her own situation at home., Serita Jakes counseled her to reach out for help and safety for herself and her children.

Find more information on the Rahab Ministry at the Potter's House here.

We all want "More!"

Today I had the pleasure of interviewing Lisa Osteen Comes. I'd say that she's the younger sister of megachurch pastor Joel Osteen, but that would sound like Lisa isn't important without that connection. In fact, Lisa Osteen Comes is an amazing woman who as just written a new book "You Are Made for More!" that has already made me stop and think about my own life.

The Osteen family pastors Lakewood Church, the largest church in America. So they live lives of privilege compared to the way most life, but Lisa is transparent when it comes to the real problems she's had in her life: born with a birth defect, divorced in her 20s, infertile in her 30s and low self-esteem for much of her life. Having been raised by deeply religious parents who also were pastors didn't make her immune from the very real problems that affect the rest of us.

But it did help her have context for them. Instead of letting them rule her life, she moved beyond them. She told me that her divorce was a complete shock and, to this day, she doesn't completely understand it. After receiving divorce papers in the mail, she holed up in her parents' home for six weeks until a kind person told her she had to get up and get out. "Turn your scars into stars," he told her. And she did.

Today she's a married mother of three and, now the author of a terrific book that will make you see your glass as half full. You'll see the good in the world and in your life.

Lisa Osteen Comes, author

of "You Are Made for More!"